I was sitting in the throne room this morning meditating over what else busy people like you and me could do with ten minutes if we didn’t have to go to the toilet, and I came up with three suggestions that I really must share with you today!
Ten minutes isn’t long, of course. I mean, chess is out, as is running a half marathon or going on a barge holiday in the Norfolk Broads. I had to think out of the box. Anyway, see what you think.
Snake & Ladder
This is a designed-for-busy-people version of the old children’s favourite, ‘Snakes and Ladders,’ created for time-scarce individuals everywhere. Throw the dice. If you throw anything other than a one, toss again. When you get a one, move to the first square.
The first square has a ladder straight up to the finish at the top of the board— hurrah! You win! Not so fast, though; the finishing square has a snake’s head which slithers you down to where you started: Oops! You lose! But wait, there’s a ladder—.
You enter a loop that you cycle through like a sock in a washing machine until your 10 minutes are up. Or your brain fossilises out of sheer boredom. Enjoy!
Swim
You really should swim about a kilometre per session to reap long-term health benefits. Boffins have proved that this can be done in 10 minutes provided you fit an outboard motor to your Speedos. Stay aware of other pool users, though; you’re not trying to recreate a scene from Jaws.
A ten-minute slice of tranquility
For the ultra-busy house-person, doing diddly squat for 600 seconds can be as refreshing as two weeks in Marbella. It’s easy to do. Just re-record your answering machine message as follows:
‘Thank you all over the place, but I need double-glazing, cavity wall insulation, or a retirement plan like a walrus needs a banjo. Until cryptocurrency can be used to buy a packet of ginger nuts in Sainsbury’s, you can keep those too. I haven’t driven my Ford Focus over a bridge in the last six months so you can spare me your dubious legal services. Oh, and you’re not getting my IP address so that you can plunder my bank accounts, either. Now jog on and have a nice day.’
I just hope your partner’s mother doesn’t call.
Greatest wishes from the smallest room
Whoopsie
Discount on all orders
Subscribe and save up to 15% on every order forever. Yes, you read that right! Mr Money Saver will be proud of you.
Change delivery frequency at any time
Are your visits to the porcelain throne room🚽 outpacing our deliveries? You can easily change the frequency of your delivery at any time. Sorry we don't offer the "as often as possible" delivery option yet.
Pause or cancel at anytime
Have enough toilet Uranus Wiper to last the next 20 years? Or maybe you just need a break up. Pause or cancel at anytime. You can also come back at anytime. 🤗